Moldy food is not all bad

Not all food needs to be throw out when it gets moldy. The USDA has published a chart with guidelines on eating moldy food. Apparently, you should scrub your salami in case of mold.

http://www.fsis.usda.gov/FactSheets/Molds_On_Food/#16

I love the Japanese

I have no idea what this is all about but I was fascinated for more than 5 minutes.

http://2006.1-click.jp/

My new disease: Post-traumatic Embitterment Disorder

Check it out: Post-traumatic Embitterment Disorder

Going to work everyday is traumatic, and this new disease explains my bitterness about that. Maybe I can get some extended leave to recover.

Sydney Hasselhop

In a previous I introduced Denise Hopper and Daniel Hasselhop. Well, Daniel Hasselhop was all alone in the backyard and my delightful neighbor got me a Cascade Hop vine at the Tilth Edible plant sale so now Daniel Hasselhop has a new best friend, Sydney Hasselhop. As a hop vine originally bred for the Northwest she is outgrowing Daniel Hasselhop and Denise Hopper by a wide margin.

Welcome, Sydney Hasselhop!

Cascade hops are probably the most popular hop in American brewing. They have a flowery citrus aroma and flavor. Cascades are a hybrid between an English hop, called Fuggle, and a Russian hop called Serebrianke.

BTW: The blog spell checker wants to replace 'Hasselhop' with 'Horsewhip'.

Welcome to the family.

We have a hop vine in our yard which produced 4.5 lbs of hops last year. We call him Dennis Hopper. I felt he was lonely so I bought 2 more rhizomes this and installed them in our yard. Right across from Dennis we planted Mrs. Denise Hopper (Dennis and Denise are married).

Dennis is Willamette hop vine which produces a woody, earthy or herbal flavored hop. Sort of the west coast hippies of the hop world. Denise is a Tettnanger which produces a very sophisticated spicy aroma in beer. Many German lagers use Tettnanger hops which are grown in the Tettnang region of Germany. So far the language barrier has not affected Dennis and Denises budding romance (that's right, I made a gardening pun).

And in the back yard we planted Daniel Hasselhop. he was named by my wife and she insists you always use his full name. He will produce a very delicate hop with a floral aroma perfect for lagers. As a proud parent I like to show off baby pictures so here is the newborn Daniel Hasselhop just before planting. I can't wait until Daniel Hasselhop is a teenager and I can embarrass him in front of his friends by showing this baby picture.

Brew Session: Calico Common

Many beer drinkers on the west coast have heard of Anchor Steam Beer but most don't know that this style of beer is distinctly American invention. The name Steam Beer was widely used for the lagers being brewed in California around the time of the gold rush (1848-1855). Just prior to this time, lager had started seeing widespread distribution in Europe due to several advances in brewing technology which made producing this cold fermented beer cost effective. Soon, German brewers migrated to America and followed the flood of fortune seekers to the California Gold Rush.
The important thing to know about lager yeast is that it makes a very clean tasting beer when fermented at cold temperatures but at warm temperatures ferment pretty funky. Now, the brewers in California needed to make this beer fast and cheap and in the California heat so they didn't bother with the cold fermentation, probably because they had no other choice.
The result was a beer brewed with a lager yeast at warm temperatures called Steam Beer. It would most likely be unpalatable to a current day beer drinker. It was considered a cheap , poorly made beer for blue-collar working men of the time.
It was quite popular into the 1900s but soon died out when refrigeration became widespread and lager could be brewed at cold temperatures anywhere. Anchor Brewing Company makes a product called Steam Beer today and have trademarked the name (brewers call the style California Common now). It is debatable whether it is similar to the original.
I find the whole story to be quite American, a low quality, barely drinkable beer created to milk the most profit from an clientele that has no choice or doesn't know better then later on a enterprising brewer tries to capitalize on the kitsch value of the name.
The home brewed version is much better than the original as the California lager yeast has evolved since then to ferment very clean at the warmer temperatures. So, after all that dry history I present my Calico California Common recipe which uses Willamette hops I grew in my own yard and random hops from my freezer that were left over from other batches.

Calico Common

Recipe for 5.5 gallons
8.75 lbs Pale 2 Row Malt
1.00 lbs Munich Malt
5 oz Vienna Malt
3 oz Chocolate Malt
6 oz Willamette Hops at 60 minutes (these are from my yard and very low acid)
2 oz Saaz (3.0%) at 30 minutes
1 oz Strisselspalt (3.3%) at 10 minutes

I made a 3 quart starter using California Lager yeast and fermented at 60F for 2 weeks. Now I am just waiting for the bottle conditioning to finish, but the green beer tasted delicious.

I have no pictures of the brew session so you will have to satisfy yourself with this picture of an old miner.

Brew Session: Kolsch

Even though my experience is limited I love Kölsch. I was told by my German buddy that the word Kölsch means Cologne-ish or from Cologne ( Köln-ish depending on where your keyboard is from). In fact the Kölsch convention of 1986 states that Kölsch must be brewed in the Cologne region of Germany.

A glass of Kölsch is tall and beautiful, much like my German friend. It should be very bubbly, have thick crown of foam and served in a small (4-7oz) glass called a Stange. The people of Cologne must have a bubble fetish(who doesn't?). This tiny glass insures that beer is fresh from the tap and still has a lot of spritz in it.

This is a light bodied beer with a delicate malt/hop balance and quite a challenge for the home brewer. There is no place for any off-flavors to hide. It is much easier to make a roasty dark beer or a IPA bursting with hops than a delicate beer like this. This means a good tasting Kölsch has to be fussed over at every stage.

My first recipe (in the picture) was very similar to this one except I used wheat malt in place of Vienna and Carapils malts. This was a very tradition recipe from the 1800s and it turned out very tasty. In fact, this beer was included in the best of show at a local home brew fair. Nowadays, Kölsch is almost never brewed with wheat malt. Wheat lends a tangy quality which I haven't tasted in any of the versions I have tried so I modernized my recipe. During the first brewing it rained and on this brew day it hailed, hence the name.

Come Hail and High Water Kölsch

Recipe for 6 gallons
9.75 lbs German Pilsner Malt
0.75 lbs Vienna Malt
0.25 lbs Carapils Malt
1 oz Hallertau 3.3% @ 60 minutes
1 oz Saaz 3.0% @ 60 minutes
1 oz Saaz 3.0% @ 10 minutes

Mash in at 147F and hold for 60 minutes (the temperature actually wondered from 145-149F during brewing). Step up to 159F and hold for 15 minutes. Boil for 90 minutes. I do a modified batch sparge but any style show work. Ferment at 57-59F, then lager for a month.



The first picture here is just before the hail started pestering, you can see I put 2 kegs to good use as a table. The seconds picture is 2 days later when the fermentation was in full swing. Check out the foam on that baby and it has a nice aroma, this tells me the fermentation is very healthy.

Bottling Day: Orval Clone and Budget Conditioning Cabinet

Today, I bottled my Orval clone. I am getting pretty good at this process and it went without incident. I like a little extra carbonation in my beers and so I always prime with a bit more sugar than the style guidelines recommend(yeast turns the sugar into CO2 and carbonates the beer in the bottle, more sugar = more carbonation). I tasted the green beer and it's very similar to Orval except a bit drier and more floral in the nose. I think it should be delicious when aged.

I recently got a bottle tree and sanitizer which made the whole process a lot quicker. Previously, I would line a box or cooler with a clean tower and put the bottles in upside down. The tree setup gets the bottles drier, faster and is convenient to grab bottles off while racking.

Bottle conditioning often takes forever in my cold basement (right now between 53-58F) so I rigged up a budget fermentation cabinet. I filled a picnic cooler with the sealed bottles, filled in the gaps with water and then put an aquarium heater in there. These little heaters are cheap at $10 and some (like this one) come with a little thermostat built in. This should keep the inside of the cooler at 65F and the bottles should carbonate within 2 weeks. I'm not in any rush, though, as this style benefits from some cellar aging and will probably mature in a few months.

Medieval Jesus

Due to massive response from my readership I have recreated the logo for my imaginary death metal band (that's right, I upgraded my imaginary band from regular to death). Now it is appropriately unreadable.

Jesus, Obama!

Is it me or is this just a bit like that art of medieval Jesus? Also, I would like to announce auditions for my new metal band:

Asahi Super Dry

Asahi Super Dry and I go way back. I have always been intrigued by that silver can. Asahi and Sapporo were 2 of the first "exotic" beers I tried. Once, when living in Idaho, I went backpacking and brought along a bunch of tiny Sapporo 2.5oz beer cans. It's nice to have a beer at the end of a long hike even if it is barely bigger than a jigger. By the way, did you know Google can convert liquid volumes for you in jiggers? Next time your frat buddies dare you to drink that collar-popping 42.6 jigger Jägermeister Über-shot you can simply use Google to avoid the embarrassing math which you couldn't do sober anyway.

Anyway, Asahi Super Dry is delicious and refreshing. This is one of the few Japanese beers I appreciate. I have to admit that this MoFo puts the 24oz American Tallboy to shame. We do have the 40, which is pretty cool, but that is just grandstanding. Unlike monster trucks and sharks, bigger is not always better. Nothing this tasty comes in a can this big. Don't underestimate the enormous can. It's as big as your face.

Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury

My review

rating: 5 of 5 stars
"There is more than one way to burn a book. And the world is full of people running about with lit matches." -Bradbury

I read 451 before in high school. I loved it then but I think I understand it better now. I feel much more sympathetic with Montag's confusion and rising hysteria over a vapid and pointless existence.

Censorship is still out there and Bradbury's ideas about dumbing down literature to make it more digestible and less challenging really spoke to me. I think society has set the bar lower in what is found offensive (apathy? cynicism?) but I also think the palate has become bland. Like fast food, all starch, fat and salt, not too spicy and nothing unexpected.



Read the appendix, it is almost better than the book.


View all my reviews.

Electronic Beer-Goggles

Apparently, on Amazon when you try to buy a 32 inch TV, 4 beers and flashy graphics will automatically upgrade you to a 40 inch.

Extreme Tedium and Anagram Madness

I have always had a thing for naming things. I just love a clever name with hidden meanings or subtle comedy. At a startup I worked at I suggested the name R.I.D.S because it was a meaningful acronym for the product but also because RID is a lice shampoo and, ironically, the software was full of bugs. On a hiking trip one of my friends had the best day of his life when we discovered the intersection of Woodcock and Kitchen-Dick road. So in a moment of extreme boredom I wondered what anagrams were contained in my name. Some people think there are hidden meanings in anagrams that describe the person. I will let you decide.

Partial Anagrams:

• Lace
• Lame
  
• Lice
• Mellow
• Molehill
• Leach
• Malice
• Callow
• Welsh (oddly, I am part Welsh)
• Leach
• Whore
• Harmonic Relish
• Camelhair Rhino (I am also part Camelhair Rhino)
• Chimera
• Mariachis
• Her Archaism Loin
• Maniac Relish
• Maniac Hole
• Rascal Heroin
• Malaise
  
• Carnal Heroism
• Cholera Rain
• Miracle Hair
• Malice
• Eclairs (I do love eclairs)
• Mescal
• Mohair
• Cream Rhino
• Harmonic Rash
• China Harems

Complete Anagrams for my full name:

• A Cleanlier Whorish Moll
• A Ceremonial Shrill Howl
• A Cashmere Hill Wino Roll
• Each A Hornier Swill Moll

Humiliations Galore

The last 2 days have been difficult for me. Today I vented my frustration to my cube mate about a project I had been working on by facetiously saying "I would rather be punched in the face" and then realized I would rather be punched in the face. Aside from work, which is difficult for everyone, I have had other tribulations.

I was pooped on. On my way to work a seagull pooped on me. I did not appreciate this. I will admit that this seagull has some talent. Not only was there crap on my coat, bag, and scarf, but the side of my face as well. So the universe shat on me. Well, this set the tone for the next 48 hours. I will not pore over the pathetic minutiae of these 2 days but here are the highlights.

• Seagull poop on my face
  
• Painstakingly peeled an orange and dropped it on the filthy floor, unable to eat it
• Smashed face into own desk while reaching for aforementioned orange
  
• Ordered desperately needed beer which waiter forgot to deliver
• Electrocuted lips on microphone
  
• Left zipper open at indeterminate time during afternoon
• Walked to bus with zipper down
  
• Rode bus with zipper down
• Went to grocery store with zipper down
• Failed to cook dinner, unable to operate a stove owned/used for previous 3 years
  
• Cooked dinner with zipper down
• Wife finds zipper tragedy hilarious
• Wife photographs crotch creating permanent record of personal inability to manage own clothing¹
  

I am not enthusiastic about the next 48 hours.


¹ More on this in future posts

Achieving that Horse Sweat Flavor

You know that fleshy bit of meat you keep behind your teeth? The one you use for speaking and grooming yourself? That's right, your tongue. Tongues (and noses by association) are not to be trusted and I will tell you why. In the process of home brewing my Orval Trappist Ale clone I discovered that the monks age their beer using a strain of yeast known as Brettanomyces Bruxellensis. Being a stickler for authenticity I ordered up a culture to use in my own batch. After I ordered this I read the marketing material on the yeast company's website:

Wild yeast isolated from brewery cultures in the Brussels region of Belgium. Produces the classic “sweaty horse blanket” character of indigenous beers... [Wyeast]

I don't personally know any horses. I have never been invited into a horse's bedroom. Apparently, they are sweaty sleepers. Maybe they have night terrors about glue factories? I don't know. But the description is so revolting that I am reluctant to add it to something I plan on drinking. (By the way, this should be not confused with unicorn sweat, revered as both an aphrodisiac and a delicious soup base)

Most likely, you have never tasted something and thought to yourself "this tastes just like that sweaty horse blanket casserole grandma used make." But, returning to my original point about the dishonest nature of tongues, if you drink a variety of wines or beers you have probably experienced this taste sensation without realizing it. Not only is it all the rage among the Trappist brewing monks (a notoriously trendy group), but it is found in some domestic(US) beers, and some wines.¹

This just goes to show that flavor is a complex mistress. Something unexpected (and repulsive) can be used in subtle ways to enhance the sensory experience. With this in mind I am willing to give it a shot in my beer. Wish me luck.

¹There are many examples in the wine world including some from the barrel-aged red, Chardonnay, and Sauvignon Blanc families. And it is used by some notable US breweries like New Belgium and Lost Abbey. Apparently, it lends an aged flavor.

Casting/Plot Idea for Twilight 2: Jacob and Edward join the Rebel Alliance

I wanted to add this to the posting on The Twilight Discussion hour blog but blogger won't allow tags in comments.

Come and Dance with Me Michael

Of Ice and Beer

On the spur of the moment our good buddy DeathBaker of the Twilight Discussion Hour contacted us about her desperate need for a Guinness. It just so happens that our local public house, Pies and Pints, pours an excellent glass of Guinness. In between planning and execution it started snowing but that wouldn't intimidate us. Unfortunately, I forgot my wallet and they were unable to serve me alcohol. I have no regrets about driving through the snow to retrieve it.

I realize that few things are nicer than sipping a Guinness on a snowy night. And even better, sitting in the dark sipping Irish whiskey and hoping for another snow day.